Even though I remind myself continuously that it could be far worse, the heartbreak is still overwhelming. I am not sure if it's because I am tired of a lifetime of having to remind myself, "This too shall pass" or continuously having to remind myself things could be worse, or that I am not as strong as I used to be. How many times can a spirit be broken and rebuilt in one's lifetime and remain strong?
Today went well for all intents and purposes it was a boring normal day, which has become my favorite type of day lately. I decided I would cook a good old fashion, southern comfort food type of a meal. As my home was filling up with the smells of the kitchen I happened to look out the window and see a white truck. At first, I thought LORD that truck has a high lift on it but then I realized it was on the back of a flatbed wrecker.
I stared at that beautiful 2016 Silverado and was reminded that there we so many of us to experience loss during Harvey. I have waited a month for this day and have had plenty of time to prepare myself for it.
Wells seems time heals all didn't work in my favor. I was strong and straightforward speaking to the driver who happens to be out of Tennessee. I found peace in that because my mother loved Tennessee and I do too. I took refuge in thinking in some small way my mother was the co-pilot of that truck and came to help me during this difficult task.
I watched him hook my dream car, a car that I spared no expense treating myself to because it was going to be the "last" vehicle I ever bought for myself. Now it was being chained and DRUGGED up on a wrecker. The horrible sound of that reflected the sound of my breaking heart.
It was horrible watching my baby being slowly damaged as it was dragged onto the back of that truck.
I couldn't watch any longer, tears began filling my eyes and I turned to go into the house.
Sobs, heart wretching gut feeling sobs began to fill the walls of my home. The sounds were unrecognizable to me and they were coming from me!
As I cried I chastised my self for being so emotional over a car for God's sake it was only metal and plastic and leather! I reminded myself over and over it could be worse! Nothing worked my heart still breaking.
Car towed, dinner picked at, dishes washed.
I decided to go for a drive, that is my "yoga" it helps clear my mind and eases my soul.
I ended up at the Post office realizing I hadn't been there in over a month.
There were two letters and a package almost like one for each of my cars that Harvey destroyed.
I read a beautiful card from Candyce and wept with gratitude. ( This is on my bucket list!)
I read a beautiful letter with a golden spoon from Melissa and wept with gratitude. (The spoon is symbolic for the AS Community, The Rose reminds me of Dennis Niklas beautiful roses and the golden represents how I feel about the people that AS has brought into my life.)
I opened the package from Suzy last and laughed and wept with gratitude.
Society would call these "small acts of kindness" but in reality, "they are large acts of love."
Each filled with words of appreciation, kindness, and encouragement.
Suzy's gift included several T-shirts and notepads with these saying on them.
Be A Sparkling Unicorn, Not A Miserable Cow (notepad and a koozie) (This was exactly what I was thinking when I created my "Garden of Gratitude!" )
Don't Take Life Too Seriously, You'll Never Get Out Alive (postcard)
Mind Your Own Biscuits and Life Will Be Gravy (postcard)
And the most perfect one to end this sad day...
This Too Shall Pass, Like A Kidney Stone (Tshirt)
As I sat in my car, in the post office parking lot, I was again overwhelmed with emotions, but emotions of gratitude, appreciation, and blessings.
I am not sure how long these beautiful items were at the Post office but I am so grateful that I found them at the perfect time when I needed a little love.
Today I am grateful for so many things especially small acts of kindness that turn out to be such large acts of love.
Today went well for all intents and purposes it was a boring normal day, which has become my favorite type of day lately. I decided I would cook a good old fashion, southern comfort food type of a meal. As my home was filling up with the smells of the kitchen I happened to look out the window and see a white truck. At first, I thought LORD that truck has a high lift on it but then I realized it was on the back of a flatbed wrecker.
I stared at that beautiful 2016 Silverado and was reminded that there we so many of us to experience loss during Harvey. I have waited a month for this day and have had plenty of time to prepare myself for it.
Wells seems time heals all didn't work in my favor. I was strong and straightforward speaking to the driver who happens to be out of Tennessee. I found peace in that because my mother loved Tennessee and I do too. I took refuge in thinking in some small way my mother was the co-pilot of that truck and came to help me during this difficult task.
I watched him hook my dream car, a car that I spared no expense treating myself to because it was going to be the "last" vehicle I ever bought for myself. Now it was being chained and DRUGGED up on a wrecker. The horrible sound of that reflected the sound of my breaking heart.
It was horrible watching my baby being slowly damaged as it was dragged onto the back of that truck.
I couldn't watch any longer, tears began filling my eyes and I turned to go into the house.
Sobs, heart wretching gut feeling sobs began to fill the walls of my home. The sounds were unrecognizable to me and they were coming from me!
As I cried I chastised my self for being so emotional over a car for God's sake it was only metal and plastic and leather! I reminded myself over and over it could be worse! Nothing worked my heart still breaking.
Car towed, dinner picked at, dishes washed.
I decided to go for a drive, that is my "yoga" it helps clear my mind and eases my soul.
I ended up at the Post office realizing I hadn't been there in over a month.
There were two letters and a package almost like one for each of my cars that Harvey destroyed.
I read a beautiful card from Candyce and wept with gratitude. ( This is on my bucket list!)
I read a beautiful letter with a golden spoon from Melissa and wept with gratitude. (The spoon is symbolic for the AS Community, The Rose reminds me of Dennis Niklas beautiful roses and the golden represents how I feel about the people that AS has brought into my life.)
I opened the package from Suzy last and laughed and wept with gratitude.
Society would call these "small acts of kindness" but in reality, "they are large acts of love."
Each filled with words of appreciation, kindness, and encouragement.
Suzy's gift included several T-shirts and notepads with these saying on them.
Be A Sparkling Unicorn, Not A Miserable Cow (notepad and a koozie) (This was exactly what I was thinking when I created my "Garden of Gratitude!" )
Don't Take Life Too Seriously, You'll Never Get Out Alive (postcard)
Mind Your Own Biscuits and Life Will Be Gravy (postcard)
Shit Creek Survivor (T shirt aka Harvey)
Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys (Tshirt)
And the most perfect one to end this sad day...
This Too Shall Pass, Like A Kidney Stone (Tshirt)
Tomorrow I will be wearing this one to the catastrophe insurance claim center.
I hope it will serve as a reminder to all of those there with me,
That This Too Shall Pass
But most of all I hope that they will get a chuckle, during such a difficult time in their lives.
As I sat in my car, in the post office parking lot, I was again overwhelmed with emotions, but emotions of gratitude, appreciation, and blessings.
I am not sure how long these beautiful items were at the Post office but I am so grateful that I found them at the perfect time when I needed a little love.
Today I am grateful for so many things especially small acts of kindness that turn out to be such large acts of love.
you are a constant reminder to me that no matter what we go through there is always place to put others first. you have been through so much in your life and still you put others suffering before your own. I have learned so so much from you. xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the beautiful and encouraging words. Wishing nothing but joy and happiness.
ReplyDelete